


New world

by luinlote



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fallen Castiel, Falling In Love, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-03
Updated: 2014-11-03
Packaged: 2018-02-23 23:36:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2559953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luinlote/pseuds/luinlote
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean wakes up one morning in the bunker with the hangover from hell and everything has changed. Or has it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	New world

**Author's Note:**

> All usual disclaimers apply; I do not own anything related to Supernatural and so on and so forth. 
> 
> This is the first fic I dare to post here, so naturally I feel slightly nervous. But I do hope you'll enjoy it!

Dean awoke with his head resting against his arms atop the big table in the living room of the bunker. His head was pounding madly and it felt like he'd been sleeping for a century, at the very least. He glanced up, but the bright light in the room made him groan and he let his head drop against his arms again, shielding him from the cruelness of the bright lamps in the big room. Had he gotten drunk last night? He smacked his lips together and his mouth didn't feel like death so... Probably not? But it did feel like a mean hangover.

  
A short while later, there was the soft sound of feet coming up behind him, and then the unmistakable thud of porcelain being placed right beside him, and the feet retreated back again. He pulled his arms from the table to place them in his lap, placing his head facefirst against the table just as the rich, wonderful smell of coffe started tickling his nose, and he groaned appreciatively as his left hand sneaked up again to search for the cup. He still didn't open his eyes.  
  
"You brought me coffee." He tried to smile at Sam, even though the side of his face was still pressed against the tabletop. Finally Sammy was taking some proper care of his big brother without any snide comments.  
  
The soft thud of footsteps came back up behind him, and Dean could hear the slurping sound as they drank from their own cup. Dean startled a bit when there was a hand on top of his head, threading through his hair, slowly trailing backwards to press firm fingers at the nape of his neck, for just a few moments before pulling back. It was an odd thing to do, but his head felt marginally better, so instead he groaned again, "Thanks, man. I feel like crap, I don't even remember what I did yesterday."  
  
There was a soft huff of laughter againt his ear then, a deep voice Dean knew very well, whispering, "You're welcome."  
  
This was followed by a kiss on the top of his head before Castiel placed his own coffee cup on the table and then pulled out the chair beside Dean's.  
  
If Dean were startled before, he was rigid in his seat now. Wait, what?  
  
What?  
  
Opening one of his eyes just a crack, he looked up and _fucking hell it really is Cas_ , sitting there completely relaxed in his chair, an amused smile on his face as he looked at Dean.  
  
Dean was starting to sweat. What the _hell_ was going on?  
  
That's the only thing Dean managed to say as well. "Cas? What? What the hell?" He slowly pulled his face from off the table, careful not to move too quickly. The pounding in his head had moved to behind his temple and it was quickly becoming worse. Very, very quickly. And way, way worse.  
  
"Would you like me to enlighten you as to what you did last night?" Cas leaned forward, and his eyes were sparkling with amusement.  
  
"I..." Dean had to look down, had to look away from the eyes boring into his. Had they always been so _blue?_ "Yes?"  
  
This had to be some kind of prank. Sam and Cas were pulling his leg and as soon as his head will stop pounding he will kick their asses.  
  
"If I remember correctly-" Dean stared at Cas. He had more stubble than when Dean last saw him, and he was wearing dark jeans and an old washed out T-shirt, full of holes around the neck and - fuck, wasn't that Dean's own old Ramones T-shirt? He stared as Castiel pulled up the T-shirt to scratch at his belly just below his navel. He tore his eyes away to look back at Castiel's face, the face that was grinning knowingly at him now.  
  
"As I already said, I remember that _you_ challenged _me_ to a drinking game last night. And you lost quite pitifully if I may say so."  
  
"What, I did no such thing!" Dean honestly couldn't remember it. Did he even meet Cas yesterday? Was Cas even in the bunker yesterday, hadn't he been out almost all day? "When? What?" He repeated feebly once again. "Why?" He added desperately, almost as an afterthought.  
  
More steps behind them, and Dean turned around quickly and cursed as his world swam and wobbled from his headache.  
  
"Has he come to?" Sam laughed, as he balanced his bowls of cereals, a glass of orange juice and a cup of coffee onto the table on the opposite side from where Cas and Dean were sitting.  
  
"Sammy!" A hint of desperation. "You remember it? Me challenging Cas to a drinking game?"  
  
"Dude, you don't even remember that? You must've been pretty far gone!" Sam scooped in a spoonful of cereals while still grinning at Dean.  
  
And suddenly Dean felt a warm hand on the low of his back, starting to stroke soft circles. He turned to stare at Cas in confusion, and his voice turned even more panicked. "Why would I even do that?"  
  
Cas raised his right eyebrow. "I honestly don't know. As I mentioned to you yesterday when you first brought this up, I might not be an angel anymore but I still have some powers left. And I definitely have a higher tolerance for alcohol than you do."   
  
"To which you shouted, 'Balls!' declared that your own tolerance was that of an anaconda, and then you started pouring the drinks. Needless to say, you lost big time." Sam helpfully supplied.  
  
"And you said that if you won I'd owe you, hmm, what was it..." Cas narrowed his eyes a little, and touched a fingers to his lips before meeting Dean's eyes squarely. "Oh, yes. 'The best fucking blowjob of your goddamned life'. And vice versa."  
  
"What?" Dean's eyes were wide, and he stared at Sam, cheeks flushed bright red now.  
  
Sam laughed at his expression. "Don't start to play coy, Dean. You know I've heard worse things than that from you two." The face Sam made had Dean wanting to kick it.  
  
"I don't even know what you two are talking about!" He sunk back in the chair, deflating completely. They were taking the joke too far, they wouldn't do that. At least Dean didn't think so. Why wouldthey do that? He closed his eyes. And then drew in a sharp breath as Castiel reached out to put a hand on his thigh.  
  
"Sorry we're messing with you, Dean."  
  
Dean looked up, relief filling him before Cas continued. "But you were rather cute when you tried to out-drink me yesterday." His hand trailed up higher, higher, to settle just between his legs and his hip, and then he leaned forward to touch his lips to Dean's swiftly, leaving behind a soft trace of coffee and... something else, as he pushed off from his chair to stand up.  
  
Dean's eyes flickered to Sam, to see his reaction to the kiss but there were none. Sam was engrossed in his computer now, obviously not caring in the slightest that their angel had turned into some kind of cuddly lovebird all of a sudden.  
  
"Cas, what the-?" He turned to Cas, but stopped before his rant could even begin because Cas was standing in front of him, his eyes gentle and caring and the breath hitched in Dean's throat at the sight of it and when Cas held out his hand to help Dean stand up, he took it despite himself.  
  
"You need a shower." Castiel led a very stunned, extremely confused Dean towards the bathroom, guiding him with a hand on his shoulder. "You've had a rough night sleeping hunched over the table. I didn't want to move you when you were passed out. I actually figured you sort of deserved it." He smiled.  
  
"Cas," Dean turned around swiftly to face him, making them stand almost chest to chest in the hallway. "What day is it?"  
  
Cas stared at him. "I think you really went too far yesterday, Dean. It's Thursday."  
  
"Thursday..." That was actually correct. "And what date?" He tried to sound casual but suspected he failed miserably.  
  
Castiel tilted his head to the side, and his eyes were narrowed in concern as he reached out a hand to pat at Dean's cheek. "September 4, 2019." He cupped his face. "Dean, are you alright?"  
  
"Yeah, yeah..." He blundered towards the bathroom. 2019. Was this the fucking future? What the hell? "I... Just need a shower. I need to wake up." He added almost to himself as he reached the door and started stepping inside the bathroom. To his horror, Cas stepped in after him. "Are you... Coming with me?" He tried to sound unfazed by the idea.  
  
This made Castiel smile again. "No. Dean, you're hung over like I have never seen before, I think you better take care of this yourself. You know I otherwise enjoy showering with you but I'm sorry, right now you are disgusting." Cas threw a toothbrush at him just as Dean said, "Hey!"  
  
Cas was leaning against the sink, arms crossed over his chest while staring at Dean and Dean tried to not feel self conscious as he shrugged off first his black shirt and then pulled of his T-shirt over his head. "Why don't you leave then?" Dean questioned cautiously.  
  
Cas laughed at that, his eyes crinkling at the corners. Dean was, despite himself, fascinated - this Cas laughs a lot. "I'm sorry, Dean." He pushed off the sink and took the two steps to where Dean was standing, and put his hands under Dean's chin, cupping his face. Then he started kissing him, soft lips pressing against Deans own, tenderly and so gently that Dean didn't know what to do. As Castiel's mouth opened against Dean's, and as his tongue started probing for entrance, was when Dean's mouth started moving of it's own accord and his tongue pushed back against Cas' in the lazy kiss they now shared. Soon, Cas pulled back with a soft nibble of Dean's lower lip and two soft pecks, one on each side of his mouth, leaving Dean both dazed and confused. "Now, go shower." He nipped at the flesh of Dean's tummy as he pulled back, and then started making his way out of the bathroom. Just before he closed the door behind him, he leaned back in quickly, "You still owe me a blowjob."  
  
And with that he closed the door and Dean was alone for the first time since he woke up.  
  
He actually DID feel kind of disgusting, so he took off the rest of his clothes and climbed in the shower letting the hot spray of the water calm both his racing heart and his headache.  
  
The future. This was definitely the future.   
  
How the fuck did he end up with _Cas_ in the future? The year he'd left was 2015, and four years... Well, four years was a long time, especially in their life and their line of work. Much can happen. Of course. And granted he couldn't see a future without his friend in it... he just didn't imagine it quite like this.  
  
He had no problems admitting to himself that he had been attracted to men in the past. But other than that time when he was 22, he'd never acted on it. It was just... Easier that way. No one needed to know, no one would be bothered by it and he didn't have to explain anything. And after all, women were fucking fantastic.  
  
But now, in the future... He was together with Cas. He guessed? The ease with which Cas acted, and the non-reaction from Sam indicated this had been going on for a while at least.  
  
Fuck, it was strange. Cas had been important to him for years already, of course. After Sam he was the most important even. He was his war buddy, his brother in arms, his... To be honest, he was Dean's best friend. Despite everything they'd done, they'd stuck by each other. Even here several years in the future.  
  
He scrubbed at his hair with shampoo and let it rinse out as the spray of the shower slowly eased the knots in his neck.  
  
Ok, so. Future. Or alternate universe, maybe? Deduction of _where_ almost done.  
  
Now came the _why?_ and the _how?_ and then of course the _how-to-get-back?_  
  
He climbed out of the shower again feeling infinitely more human now.  
  
"How?" He said out loud as he looked at himself in the mirror.  
  
He pulled a new towel from the cupboard under the sink and started toweling off. He was still deep in thought while he dried himself off, and as he was done and had smelled his previously worn clothes and ruled them out as unwearable - no wonder Cas had said he was disgusting, he reeked - he realized he had nothing new to wear in here. He wound a bath towel around his waist and peeked outside the door. Coast was clear, so he made it out the corridor and hoped against hope that his room was still in the same place as before, so that he could find some new clothes. He almost turned in the doorway though because it wasn't his room at first look, but then... His things were still there. The photo of him and his mom were in a picture frame on the right side bedside table. He recognized a few of the clothing hanging in the open closet. A car magazine was on his pillow.  
  
But the left side had changed. There was an extra pillow there now too. There were two covers on the bed. Another bedside table, and on it there was a lamp, a glass of water, a newspaper and a book. It was obvious the bed was used by two people.  
  
"Oh fuck." Dean whispered to himself as he pulled out some clean clothes from the closet.  
  
He slowly dressed while taking in all the changes in the room. The wardrobe was definitely fuller. As his fingers swept over Castiel's old trenchcoat, he couldn't help but smile a little. And he definitely felt like a snoop as he opened the drawer of the left side bedside table. There was a bible there and a worse-for-wear looking diary. He had to open it, just to see if there were any clues. He felt bad as he flipped it open to the last used page, but it was only a record of yesterday's weather. The pages were filled with different things as Dean skimmed through it. The journal stretched back a couple of years and there was everything from records of different hunts or more notes on weather, Cas' unintentionally random observation of humanity, longer scribbles, short notes. On one page only three words were written, 'I said yes.'. And then more scribbles, more hunts, and extremely random there was also a recipe for a pumpkin stew that made Dean puff out a sound of laughter. On the first page of the journal, he recognized his own spiky handwriting and his face heat up at the implication from the inscription.  
  
'Castiel,  
I feel stupid for writing something here but Sammy said I should and he's staring at me right now to make sure I actually do it. I don't know what to say, though but... Enjoy this, I know you like writing down your thoughts.  
  
You know, right?  
Dean'  
  
So, in this time, reality, world... They really must be... in love, huh? Him and Cas.  
  
He scratched the back of his head, and put the diary back exactly the way he'd found it.  
  
And then he took a deep breath and headed out from the room, in search of the others, and with that hopefully some answers.  
  
He found Cas at the table in the living room again, munching away at a sandwhich, a magazine open in front of him.   
  
"Er, hey." Dean hated how he felt his ears go pink. Hopefully Cas wouldn't notice.   
  
"Are you feeling more alive after the shower? You looked terrible."  
  
"Yeah, I guess so. I think I'm fine now." He glanced over at Cas, and his stomach rumbled at the sight of food.  
  
"I guess you must be better if you're hungry. There's one here for you too. Turkey, mayo." Cas turned the plate around and pushed it towards Dean. "And I got a lead on a case in Arizona just by Tucson, Garth told me there were rumors of something tearing people apart over there."  
  
Dean sat down in the chair and tried to casually not sit too close to Castiel as he reached out to grab the ciabatta from the plate.  
  
"Garth's... Okay?" He questioned cautiously.  
  
"Of course. Why wouldn't he be?" Cas looked up. "He just can't go there himself now since there will be a full moon in three days."  
  
"Yeah, of course." Dean had almost eaten half of the sandwich already, it was delicious. Time travel or whatever it was really got his appetite running. "I just didn't realize we're that close to full moon."  
  
"Yeah, so Garth suggested we send Daphne and Keith right away, he thinks they should be close by."  
  
Dean nods, his mouth full of bread. "Of course... Daphne and Keith. They're awesome." He hazarded a guess.  
  
"Last time you saw them work you told me they were asshats who think too much of themselves." Cas cocked his head.  
  
"Uh, Cas-"  
  
"Of course. Sarcasm." He grinned, as he reached out to brush breadcrumbs from the stubble on Dean's chin. "One day, Dean, I will understand it."  
  
Dean couldn't help but grin back. "I doubt it." He got a strange urge to reach out and stroke Cas's face back, or kiss him or something, but he stopped himself as Cas turned away to continue reading his newspaper again.  
  
And as Cas flipped a page, Dean saw it. He stared at it, actually, couldn't tear his eyes from it. There, glistening on the ring finger of Castiel's hand was a thin silver band. It was a simple one, and Dean didn't think it was a terribly expensive ring but once again he started reeling from the implication of what he was seeing. Were they...?  
  
He looked down at his own hand, and he wondered how he could have missed it before - there it was, an identical band on his own ring finger. He looked at Cas' hand again.  
  
"I know." Cas interrupted his thoughts, twirling the ring around on his finger. He had obviously noticed where Dean had been looking. "I can't believe it either... It's two years since you asked... Well, two years since you gave me this ring." He stared at Dean, and there was an intensity to his eyes that Dean had seen many many times before; all the times that Cas has invaded his personal space in the past.  
  
"Yeah. Well..." He cleared his throat. "You know?" He didn't know what to say or do, so he hoped that would work. He'd never been particularly good with words after all. But he now thought he understood the _'I said yes'_ page in the diary.  
  
"I know." Cas turned his eyes back to the magazine, but he kept touching his ring.  
  
"If you're feeling better, I wanted to show you something." Cas said after a few minutes, pointing at his magazine and sliding it over to him.  
  
"Sure. Hey, where's Sam?" He looked around them.  
  
"He's meeting Danielle for lunch somewhere." Cas smiled. "I think he really likes her, he was really nervous when he was getting ready to meet her. He changed his shirt five times, running back and forth forgetting both car keys and the flowers.  
  
Dean had to smile at that. Had Sammy found someone? His first thought was _someone too_ but he scratched that before it got hold.  
  
"He should be back in a couple of hours, if he doesn't stay at her place tonight again." Cas continues. "Dean, look at this now, I think it might be important." Cas pointed at the magazine spread again.  
  
"This magazine is often ignored because of the heavy conspiracy theories it brings up but I wonder about this article. It's-"  
  
He was interrupted by a call on one of the maybe 10-or-so-phones that were set up on the table.  
  
"FBI Agent Stanley, Washington office." Cas hummed, nodded, "Yes, agents Dodge and Devaux, that's correct. Yes. Thank you."  
  
Dean stared. Had the bunker turned into some kind of... Technical head-quarter? Were they in charge?  
  
Cas continued like nothing had happened, "As I said, this article is about seven disappearances every seven years. They didn't find much else, but I did some research, and it seems they follow a trail where the disappearances happens 77 miles from each other and always at the seventh month of the year. Of course this magazine thinks it is aliens which I highly doubt, but I think it might be something. We should send someone on it. I was thinking the Swanson's might do this one well. It's up in Cheyenne, they're just an hour or two away."  
  
"Sure." Dean was impressed to say the least. "Sounds great." He stared at Cas, couldn't help himself, he was impressed. "You're good at this."  
  
Cas raised his eyebrows. "I like to think so, yes."  
  
"You're actually great at this, aren't you?" Dean was shocked to find that he was leering, _flirting_ with Cas now. And it had only been a few hours. What the hell.  
  
Cas was grinning back, a crooked grin that was all too charming. "I am good at a lot of things, Dean."  
  
Dean wanted to find out exactly what it was, but the phone rang again and Castiel leaned forward to answer, and Dean couldn't help but to feel like he was saved by the bell as he took the used sandwich plate and made his way to the kitchen to wash it just to have something to do.  
  
A few minutes later though, Cas followed him there, refilling his empty coffee cup. Dean was washing the dishes as Cas came up behind him, his hands trailing around Dean's waist. He nibbled at his neck, and the hair at the back of it prickled not at all unpleasantly. Deans hands were still in the soapy water, still having a few items left to wash up. He stilled, though, leaning into the touch instead. What the hell was going on with him?  
  
"Don't stop on my account." Cas murmured in his ear, as he kneaded Dean's lower abdomen softly, nipping at Dean's ear with gentle teeth. "It is your week to do the dishes after all."  
  
Dean pulled his hands up from the water, drying them off on his newly changed t-shirt. As one of Castiel's hands moved lower, to tease at the waistband of his boxers before slipping inside them, Dean's hands came to cling at Cas' arms. He breathed in deeply through his nose.  
  
"Cas-"  
  
Cas scratched at the trail of hair leading down to his already hardening cock. "You promised me a blowjob, Dean." He whispered against his ear.  
  
"I-" Dean hesitated.  
  
"But I think the one who won the bet should be the one to decide how the win should be dealt with." He slipped his hand out of the boxers. "And since I won I think that for my prize... I want to hear you gasping my name." He twisted Dean around then, pressing their chests together. "Would that be acceptable to you, Dean?"  
  
Dean almost lost his breath as those blue eyes bore into his, and his hands moved on their own accord as he suddenly lounged forward, and put his arms tightly around Castiel, pressing the entirety of their bodies together. He could feel Castiel's hardening cock rubbing against his own through their fabrics of clothes, as he licked inside Castiel's mouth taking control of the kiss. He pushed Castiel back against the kitchen table, all the while kissing like their life depended on it. His tongue was fucking Castiel's mouth and he was so turned on he didn't even fucking care. Had it really only been a few hours since he'd turned up here?  
  
Cas made a sound deep in his throat, and Dean reached to grab at his thighs, to lift him on to the table. Cas' legs immediately wound around Dean's hips and they rutted against each other and flightily Dean wondered if this Cas and _the other Dean_ are always this desperate for each other. And then he suddenly remembered how intensely the past-Cas, alternate-universe-Cas, the Castiel _he_ knows looks at him every single day back home and he hears himself make a strangled sound as he pushes himself even more firmly against Cas and he thinks he might come from just this, when Cas suddenly pulls back, hair in complete disarray and his pupils so dilated that the blue of his eyes are almost completely obscured.  
  
"Dean, wait-" he removes his legs from Dean's hips and stands up as he slowly kisses his way over Dean's face.   
  
He pushes at Dean's chest, placing him against one of the doors in the kitchen, and Dean leans against it, catching his breath. At least he does for a moment, before Cas crouches down to stand on his knees. His hands goes around to knead at Dean's ass, while he leans forward to nuzzle Dean's crotch with his face. He keeps kneading Dean's ass with one hand, while the other reached forward, and onehandedly he unbuttons and unzips Dean's jeans, pulling them down with practiced ease. And if that isn't the biggest fucking turn on Dean has ever experienced he doesn't know what is.  
  
"Cas," he breathes.  
  
Castiel just humm's, and he's so damn close to Dean's cock that he can feel it all the way up to his spine.  
  
Dean knows he's already leaking, his boxers already stained with precome, and as Cas mouths him through the fabric of his boxers, Dean thinks he might just die.  
  
Castiel lifts a hand and strokes up the length of Dean's thigh, pulling his legs a little bit more apart, while the other hand goes to stroke up the length of his shaft through his boxers. As he runs two fingers down, he finally cups Dean's balls as he slides the boxers down just a little to take the tip of his cock in his mouth.  
  
Dean almost chokes on his own tongue. "Cas, I-"  
  
"Calm down, I hardly even started yet." Cas admonishes sweetly, before pulling the boxers down to Dean's knees. He circled his hands around to the backside of Dean's knees and slowly slowly starts stroking his way up to the inside of Dean's thighs, as he leans forward and places a soft kiss over his pelvic bone.  
  
"Are we really doing this in the kitchen?" Dean huffs out a laughter. He can't fucking believe that this is happening.  
  
"Would you like for us to pause and move somewhere else?" Dean groans - he can _feel_ the smile against his pelvis.  
  
Castiel moves then, shuffling his knees to a better position on the rug, before reaching a hand up to scratch lightly along Dean's ribs, and as he moved his arm up he grace against the head of Dean's still relatively untouched cock, making Dean suck in a deep breath through his nose, his head falling back against he door.  
That was Castiel's cue to reach out with his other hand to grip around the base of his shaft, and Dean hears himself make a sound he's never made before as Cas slowly starts pumping him while still licking slow circles along his hip and pelvis.  
  
A thought suddenly flies into Dean's head, a thought from his own reality wherever that is. It had been so long since he'd had sex, and in all honestly he hadn't thought about it much at all which was very rare for him. But there just hadn't been... Time, Dean thought flightily while he groaned as Cas's thumb stroked at the skin between his leg and his crotch.  
He'd had so much to do, Cas had moved into the bunker with them and most... Well, almost all nights he would stay in and the three of them would talk and, maybe watch a movie. And if he were honest he would stay up late with Cas almost every night and the two of them would talk and exchange stories of what they'd been through and he had fallen asleep against Cas' shoulder in the couch more than twice the past few weeks and-  
  
"-oh fuck!" His hips buckled as Cas swiped a tongue over the top of his cock, and his hand moved to grip at the hair on top of Castiel's head.  
  
"Was I boring you?" He asked after another long swipe of his tongue along the shaft. "You really weren't paying attention."  
  
"Fuck, of course I - I was thinking."  
  
"About what?" Cas questioned right before he guided Dean's cock into his mouth, taking almost half of it in one swift motion and sucking while curling his tongue around it and Dean really thought he might explode.  
  
 _So long._  
  
"About you," he gasped desperately, moving his hips.  
  
"Hmm-" Cas made a sound around his cock, a sound that vibrated all the way up Dean's spine, before he let him go with a soft 'pop'. He looked up at Dean, with narrowed eyes and a tilt to his head. "Interesting."  
  
And then he grabbed around the base of his cock again, and started tugging at the same time as he took him in his mouth, sucking enthusiastically, while his tongue curled just so.  
  
Just when Dean thought he couldn't take anymore, Cas released him with his hand and stroked his way down, to cup his balls instead, and god _so long_ and he didn't even notice that Cas had stopped mouthing him and put two of his own fingers in his mouth.  
  
But as Cas started pumping Dean's cock again he reached between his legs with the wet fingers and Dean startled as he felt them between the cleft of his ass.  
  
"Oh fuck." He'd never done this before. He tensed up for just a second, but was too far gone, too desperate and too turned on to ignore the wet mouth pumping him, and when Cas gently pushed in the first finger he almost lost his breath, the feeling so intense his toes curled against the kitchen floor.  
  
He made a frustrated sound when he tried spreading his legs but they wouldn't move, his boxers still in the way around his knees. "Cas, I need to get these off."  
  
Castiel helped him with one hand, his other still moving his finger inside him.  
  
At the same time the boxers were off, Dean spread his legs wider, and Castiel pressed in a second finger, and he was so close now, so fucking close.  
  
Castiel pulled his mouth off of him completely to instead trail kisses along the length, up and down and Dean grabbed harder at Castiel's hair at the same time as he threw a leg over his shoulder. Gritting his teeth, he groaned, "Come on, Cas," as he pressed the heel of his foot against Cas' shoulder blades, urging him on.  
  
As Cas takes him back into his mouth, there is a careful scrape of teeth against the head of his cock and he twists his fingers just so inside of Dean, hitting that sweet spot and Dean's hips bucks and he comes harder than he's ever had before, light flashing before his eyes, his foot almost lifting from his floor as he arches his back, spilling into Cas' mouth.  
  
Dean keeps moving his hips, and Castiel keeps lapping away until Dean's breathing has calmed down and then he reaches out to tug Dean's leg from his shoulder. Dean is trembling on his legs, so Cas tugs at his T-shirt and pulls him down on the floor with him to a sprawled position. He slides in between Dean's legs and leans in to kiss him, his eyes stormy and so full of love that Dean's breath catches in his throat. The kiss is open mouthed and greedy and Dean is too sated and confused to feel at all self conscious or embarrassed as he places his hands to cup Castiel's face and kiss him back with all he has.  
  
Separating after a few minutes with soft pecks against each others lips and cheeks and chins, Cas asks, "What were you thinking about when you were so distracted?" Another soft peck to Dean's brow.  
  
Dean's arm was around Cas' back and it felt so fucking natural, he never wanted to take it away from rubbing soft circles along his spine.  
  
"I wasn't distracted." He met Cas' eyes and he grinned. "As I said, I was thinking."  
  
"Never a good thing." Castiel nodded solemnly at him, and Dean punched him in the arm.  
  
"And you say you don't understand sarcasm."  
  
"Well," another lopsided smile that made Dean's heart thump alarmingly in his chest. "Sam taught me the basics."  
  
"I'm sure he did." Dean couldn't help but laugh at that.  
  
"You said you were thinking," Cas prodded again. "About me?"  
  
"Yeah, well..." Dean flushed for a bit. "Just, you know, you. And me. And when and where." He was so fucking terrible at these kinds of stuff.  
  
"Yeah, I've been thinking about that too lately. The anniversary is coming up and it's difficult for me to believe sometimes after everything that's happened, that I am still here with you. And with Sam." He touched his forehead to Dean's own and closed his eyes. "Ever since that first time I saw you, gripped you tight and brought you back... and how I already knew it back then. That you would change my utter existence forever." He opened his eyes again, electric blue. "And after so many mistakes, misunderstandings and now here we are. That you finally understood my feelings."  
  
Dean swallowed thickly. Cas had always felt this way?   
  
"You still can't remember when we first met, and that's a good thing for you, you know I think so. But for purely selfish reasons I sometimes wish you could remember how intense it was, those feelings we shared when we first met in hell." Cas stroked his stubbled cheek with the back of his hand.   
  
Dean floundered then. They had _something_ even back in hell? He could do nothing else than grab Cas' wrist, and place it against his own heart as he kissed Cas.  
  
Then the sleepiness came over him, no surprise there.  
  
"Are you getting sleepy, Dean?" Cas stroked a hand through his hair. "We should move to the bedroom, Sam will get mad if he comes home and finds you pantsless in the kitchen again." Cas started pulling away and Dean was getting more and more drowsy.  
  
"Again?" Dean chuckled even as his eyes were drooping closed. He was getting so sleepy. "It's happened before?"   
  
"He wouldn't meet my eyes for three days when he found us in the library that one time. I think he was more incredulously insulted that the books had to witness that, than he was embarrassed though." He pulled Dean up to stand but just then he fell asleep...

 

  
  
... Only to wake up again what felt like a second later, to a completely different setting. He was still weak in his knees, but now his arms were aching like a bitch too and that was new. And then there were soft slaps against his face, but it was impossible to open his eyes to see what it was. But his nose worked and he wrinkled his nose against the stench that came over him as his brain slowly started working again. There was a sour tang to the air - piss, and old mould. Then came the slightly irony smell of blood and then he choked and started coughing as he realized it wasn't just the smell of blood, but also the taste of it in his mouth.  
  
And then there was a hard slap to his cheek again, and his brothers frantic voice calling to him. "Dean! Dean, wake up!" And suddenly all the sounds came crashing down around him. A high pitched scream, and a loud thud followed by the sound of bone crushing against asphalt. Dean could finally open his eyes, and he looked right into Sam's worried face. "Finally!" He clapped at the side of Dean's face carefully.  
  
"Sammy? Wha'ppened?" His head ached, and his toes could just barely touch the floor.  
  
"A djinn, Dean, it was a djinn. How are you feeling, can you stand?" He turned his face away to shout to his left, "Cas, he's come to! He's awake!"  
  
"I'm coming!"  
  
"Cas?" Dean's voice was soft even to his own ears. Had it all been a dream? A djinn induced dream. He sagged and felt for the first time that the pain in his arms were from being tied up in his wrists, strung up with them pulled over his head, his feet barely making contact with the floor.  
  
"Yeah, he's here. We were so worried, man, we've been looking for you for days. Cas's taking care of the djinn, he's here."  
  
In reply there was the unmistakable sound of a knife thrust into a body and the sound that indicated it was an angel blade.  
  
"Dean," Cas came running up to them, his long coat flapping around him and Dean almost lost his breath.  
  
"Cas, I'll tie him down, will you hold him up." Sam let go of his hold on Dean and Cas came up to catch him instead, his arms going around Dean's chest, just under his arms.  
  
"Hello, Dean." Their faces were only inches apart and Dean was dizzy, wondered if he was imagining the storm of emotions that played across his face and in his eyes. "We were worried about you"  
  
"Yeah, well," Dean coughed and choked on the blood in his mouth again, spluttering a little. "Sorry about that."  
  
Cas tilted his head to the side, staring at Dean with narrowed eyes just as Sam untied the last bond and Dean sagged against Cas' body.  
  
"You guys okay?" Sam jumped down from the box he'd been standing on while he untied his brother.   
  
"I've got him. He's weak, but I think his legs are mostly numb from unuse." He cradled Dean against his chest. "Are you otherwise unharmed?"  
  
"I..." Dean couldn't stop staring at Cas' face so close to his own. In his mind, the taste of his kisses still lingered, and the lopsided smile was etched in his memory.  
  
"The djinn has been taken care of," Sam spoke beside them and Dean turned his face to look at him. "We should head out to the car." He stood beside Dean and put one of Dean's arms around his neck. Castiel did the same, and together they managed to drag Dean out to the car, place him in the backseat and then they went back inside to take care of the djinn.  
  
Dean's head was spinning madly. Blood loss, dehydration, his strange djinn-induced dream. It was only a few minutes until he passed out in the backseat.  
  
"Dean, buddy." Sam was back again, and he was shaking lightly at Dean's shoulder. "We've got some water for you, here." He propped Dean up a little and let him drink some mouthfuls of water. "You okay to get going?"  
  
Dean nodded. "Yeah, I'm good. We can go."  
  
There was only a few minutes before Dean fell asleep again, and he only woke up when they pulled in by the motel's parking lot. Sam opened the door and helped Dean sit up. "Are you feeling any better? You were asleep for awhile." With a smile he nodded towards the room of their motel, where Cas was just unlocking the door. "Cas's been really worried for you, even in the car on the ride here he kept turning around to see how you were every few seconds."  
  
Dean didn't know how to respond to that, so he ignored it as he dragged himself to a sitting-position. "A shower and I'll be fine." He wobbled a bit as he sat but the spinning in his head seemed to be getting better.   
  
"Great." Sam stood back as Dean slowly made it out of the impala on his own. He stumbled a few times on his way towards the motel room but he made it there alright. Castiel was holding the door open for him as he walked in, and his eyes were wildly concerned as he followed Dean with his gaze.  
  
As Dean sunk down on his bed and started to peel of his heavy boots, Sam sat down on his own while Cas sat down on the edge of the sofa.  
  
"Do you remember anything yet?" Sam asked.  
  
"Yeah, I remember us hunting the djinn now. I don't know how I could forget, we've been after it for weeks! Stupid fucking djinn and stupid fucking dreams-" he paused and tilted his head to look over at Castiel quickly.  
  
"You seemed pretty far gone." Sam nodded seriously. "We tried to wake you for more than 20 minutes before the djinn even arrived."  
  
"Yeah, I was pretty out of it." Dean nodded. "The dream was, er, intense."  
  
"I noticed. You were actually smiling when we found you, it was kind of creepy. Cas tried to splash you with water to wake you."  
  
"You were very far gone in the dream, Dean." Cas stood up and walked closer to where Dean was sitting. "We were afraid you didn't want to come back." He sat down on the side of Dean's bed and Dean found it troublesome to look away from those eyes at all, at least until Sam cleared his throat.  
  
"What were you dreaming about?" He questioned, his voice soft and understanding.  
  
"It was, an alternate universe I guess you could say." Dean definitely didn't look at Cas then.  
  
"Was it mom again? Like last time?" Sam's voice turned even gentler.  
  
Dean couldn't lie to him. "No, it was... Something else. It was sort of like the future. Or a future."  
  
"Oh, what was it?" Sam's curiosity got the better of him, but no, this was something Dean couldn't say.  
  
"It was just... Us. The three of us. We had a good life a couple of years from now. We were in the bunker but it seemed like we didn't have to hunt much anymore."  
  
"That's-" Sam started but Castiel cut him off.  
  
"Was I in your dream of the future? Did you include me in your future, Dean?" His eyes were bright in the dim light of the room as their eyes met again.  
  
"I, well, yeah, I guess so?" Dean floundered again for the right words. "I mean, if you'd still want to hang around? If you would want to."  
  
"I would like that more than anything, Dean."  
  
When Sam cleared his throat again, Dean tore his eyes away immediately and he instantly hated his brother and his stupid smug expression. Which wasn't all that smug really, more like a kind upside-down smile directed at Cas. But still, smug bastard.  
  
"We'd like that too, Cas." Sam said. "After all, you're family. Right, Dean?" And there it was, that smug fucking smile directed at Dean and Dean had seen it before when Sam was talking about Castiel with Dean but Dean had never understood it before. Dean cursed Sam a million times in his head.  
  
"Of course." Dean couldn't meet Cas' eyes so he looked at his shoulder instead. "You're very helpful." Dean wanted to slap a hand to his forehead, what the fuck was he even saying.  
  
To make matters worse, Sam laughed. "Yeah, Castiel. You're very _helpful_ , we're happy to have you."  
  
To Dean's surprise, Cas actually smiled a small smile at that as he stood up from the bed. "I am happy to be of assistance." He started making his way to the bathroom, "Excuse me, I need to urinate."  
  
Sam turned to Dean as Cas closed the door behind him, a grave expression on his face. "I am happy for you too, Dean. You are also very helpful." A twitch to his lip.  
  
"Fuck you, Sammy." Dean showed him the middle finger before he threw himself on the bed on his side, his back to Sam.  
  
"Aww, is that any way to speak to your little brother. After all, I've also been very helpful today!"  
  
Dean threw a pillow at Sam but missed completely, his arms so tired and wobbly still.  
  
"Are you fighting again?" Cas asked as he came out from the bathroom, wiping his hands on a paper towel.  
  
"Sam's being a dick."  
  
"I am most definitely not. I was just going to offer to go buy something to eat, but then I guess I should just let it be."  
  
"Bring me a bacon-cheese. And don't come back without pie."  
  
"Of course. I enjoy being helpful."  
  
Sam was still laughing as he went out the door. A dick, his baby brother was definitely a dick.  
  
"I don't know what you were arguing about." There was a rustle of fabric as Cas pulled off his coat. Dean couldn't help but look. "But you have to know that Sam is very relieved to have you back. He has been frantic with worry since you disappeared." Cas looked over at him with a gentle expression that made Dean think of kisses and the faint taste of himself in Cas' mouth. He swallowed.  
  
Then he heard the soft snap of a belt being pulled from it's loops. Dean still looked, despite himself, as Castiel kept undressing.  
  
"I know. I'm happy you guys got me out of there, you did good."  
  
Cas pulled off his black suits jacket and rolled up the arms of his white shirt. He'd seen it many times before and while he might've let his eyes linger before on the open V of the neck of his shirt it was nothing compared to what he was doing now. Cas was turned away from him and he was admiring the play of muscles along his back, how the shoulder blades were shifting underneath the shirt as Cas moved.  
  
Cas turned back towards him and Dean looked at him. Had it all been a dream, a fantasy, or was it something there? Dream-Cas had been so clear with his affections, so obvious. But Dean wasn't sure about this Cas... Surely he would know if Castiel had had feelings for him ever since hell?  
  
"What are you thinking about?"  
  
Castiel was suddenly very close to him, and the question was asked just as gently as when the Castiel from his dream had asked it.  
  
Dean sat up straight. "Nothing. I just think I need to shower."  
  
Cas stood back up and just nodded.  
  
Dean's head was still spinning in the shower, mostly from his whirlwind of thoughts about Cas.  
  
And everything Cas had done for him, to him, with him through the years.  
  
"I gave everything for you."  
  
"I won't hurt Dean,"  
  
"I'm sorry, Dean."  
  
"I was getting too close to the humans in my charge. You."  
  
His thoughts were spinning even faster now, as his thoughts went to himself and his own reactions to Castiel. Hadn't he himself desperately clinged to Cas as he told him he needed him?  
  
He remembered telling him to never change, and that he'd rather have him, no matter what condition.  
  
He'd always repressed this part of himself, hadn't he? It was... Well, he liked women, didn't he?  
  
But... He'd wondered himself when he'd picked up Castiel's wet trenchcoat from the lake he'd walked into after the Leviathan had taken him. He'd kept it, folded up close to him no matter where he went. When he'd seen Cas as Emanuel that time, his heart had beat such a violent tattoo against his chest that he'd thought he was going to fall over.  
  
And when he'd found Cas in purgatory after searching for him for weeks and weeks... He'd wanted to never let go from that hug, but Benny was there and clearing his throat and... He had to let go.  
  
The shower was scolding hot but Dean was still shivering all over as he scrubbed himself clean.  
  
Another 30 minutes passed before there was a rap on the bathroom door and Sam announced that he was back with a whole bag of greasy fries for him.  
  
"And pie?" Dean asked while he toweled himself off.  
  
"They were out. I tried two different places, sorry!"  
  
Dean cursed his bad luck under his breath as he walked out of the bathroom, and Sam was happily holding up an apple pie for him. "Sorry, I had to." He grinned. "It's apple." He wriggled it in front of Dean, who snagged it and held it protectively against his chest.  
  
"I hate you." Dean couldn't help but to grin back, and then his eyes settled on Castiel who was fast asleep on his bed, still in his slacks and white shirt.  
  
"What happened to Mr Comatose, huh?" Dean asked.  
  
"I put his salad in the fridge, he needs sleep more. He hasn't slept even a second since you were taken." Sam took a bite off of his own Caesar salad.  
  
"Not at all?" Dean stared at him.   
  
"Not at all. He..." A serious expression came over Sam. "He really cares for you, Dean."  
  
"Yeah, I know." Dean peeled the wrapping off from his burger and started chewing.

 

\- - -  
  
A week or two passed after that, and Dean kept thinking about his dream. It was difficult to let go of, because it had felt so real. And the more he thought about it, the more he wanted it and the less impossible it seemed.  
  
Cas really did care for him. And he was there, he didn't seem to want to leave them. He was a good resource, he was becoming a good hunter and he was... Well, he was Cas. And Dean liked him. He'd liked him for a long time, he realized, the more he thought about it.  
  
His reactions, seeing Cas everywhere as he'd gotten out of purgatory. The nightmares of Castiel that had hurt so badly that Dean himself couldn't stand it.  
  
The hurt and betrayal he felt when Cas had been lying to him for almost a year.  
  
It had all hurt so much, because he _liked_ Cas.  
  
It was a revelation that was particularly terrifying. And he had no one to talk to about it. He awoke several times a night with his head full of images of Cas' mouth wrapped around his cock. It was bothersome the first night at the motel, but the other nights while they were back in the bunker were more frustrating than anything, but he knew how to take care of the problem.  
  
One night, the three of them were doing research, they were spread on each side of the long table in the living room, a wide array of maps and papers spread all over it. Dean went to get them beers, placing one in front of Sam who nodded, and then he went to where Cas was sitting and handed him one, and not able to help himself he placed a hand on Castiel's shoulder and let it linger for a moment or two. And then it happened. Cas turned towards him and said, "Thank you, Dean." And he smiled that lopsided smile that Dean had dreamed about ever since that Dream. Dean's heartbeat sped up and he wanted to smack himself for acting like a 13 year old girl, but instead he smiled back goofily and squeezed Cas' shoulder again before sitting down himself.  
  
That evening Sam announced there was a new episode of Game of Thrones so they should take a break for an hour or two.  
  
When Dean came to the TV-room they'd set up, Sam was in one of the two armchairs and Castiel in the sofa. Dean had a choice, in the sofa with Castiel or in an armchair by himself and with a sigh he decided he was definitely not a scared little chicken. He handed Cas the popcorn bowl and brought another set of beers to the table and slid down next to Cas just as Sam started the episode.  
  
Cas were sitting cross legged with the snacks bowl in his lap, and Dean very intentionally scooted a tiny bit closer every time he reached out to take more popcorn.  
  
When the episode was over, Sam decided they should watch a movie as well and when half the movie had passed Sam suddenly announced he just realized that he had seen this movie before and bid them both a rather hasty goodnight.  
  
Castiel held out the popcorn bowl to Dean as he took a swig of his beer. "That is odd that he just remembered now that he's seen this movie before." Cas observed. "I would have thought Sam had better memory."  
  
"Yeah, might be." Dean took a handful of popcorn from the proffered bowl. "Or it might not." Dean cursed his brother, the observant little shit that he is.  
  
Cas stared at him, and Dean figured this might be his moment. He reached out for the remote, and paused the movie. He had no freakin' clue what the plot of it was anyway. There was a dude and a horse and lots of green scenery, other than that he didn't know.  
  
"Listen, Cas," Dean started and turned to him, and Castiel turned too, and gracefully shifted his position so now he was sitting on one leg, the other one in front of him. Dean was so distracted by the sight of his bare foot that he almost lost track of what he was going to say. Which he actually hadn't figured out yet.  
  
"Dean?"  
  
"Yeah, listen, there's this... Thing I want to talk to you about." He breathed out. "I hope we can... Yeah, anyway. So."  
  
"So." Cas repeated seriously while nodding, looking just as stern and concentrated as he does when they're discussing an attack plan of the monster-of-the-week. It made Dean laugh a little.  
  
"Cas, I'm going to try again, okay." Another deep breath. "The dream I had when I was captured by the djinn, you were there."  
  
"Yes, I am aware of that. You already told us."  
  
"But I didn't tell you everything. In the dream, we were... I guess you could say, together?"  
  
Cas raised his eyebrows. Did Dean imagine the flush creeping up on the ex-angel's cheeks?  
  
"I guess my subconscious wanted that very much because we were actually engaged." Dean coughed a little. He thought he was actually doing pretty good, considering how bad he usually is with words.  
  
"We were engaged?" Cas sat up straighter and put the popcorn bowl down on the table in front of them. "In your dream, you had us, me and you, engaged?"  
  
"Yeah. What do you think about that?" Okay, that was a chicken move to make, to force the next move on Castiel.  
  
Castiel was quiet for a few moments, before he narrowed his eyes at him. "Are you making fun of me, Dean?"  
  
He actually sounded a bit angry, and Dean started, "No, no, I'm not, I just-" he was backpedaling on thin ice, he could feel it, and Castiel looked angrier by the second. He was standing up now, towering above Dean who was still sitting down.  
  
"Dean, I have never laid any type of claim on you, I have tried to not make you uncomfortable. I have showed you nothing but respect regarding this matter, so if you are making fun of me because of my feelings for you I will actually become very upset." The air around him crackled.  
  
Wait, what?   
  
"Wait, _what?_ " Dean spluttered and stood up too. "You have feelings for me?"  
  
"Fuck you, Dean." Cas put a finger in Dean's chest, pushing hard. "Stop it. I'll leave if it makes you uncomfortable." His eyes were a stormy ocean, full of anger and regret and sadness before he turned away.  
  
Dean grabbed his wrist. "You're not listening to me, Cas, wait!" He was getting angry now too. "I'm telling you MY dream! What MY subconscious wanted. Listen to me for fucks sake. I can't stop thinking about you." He twisted Cas around, placing them face to face.  
  
Cas blinked once, twice. "What?"  
  
"For a dude centuries old, you sure are slow on the uptake." He didn't dare to look at Cas. "I just... Maybe we could try, you and me? You know? If you'd want it?" He still had a tight grip on Cas' wrist.  
  
"Dean," Cas stared at him intensely. "If I would want you, are you asking me that?"  
  
Dean blushed, couldn't even answer. He nodded his head sharply, just once.  
  
Cas reached out with his other hand, the one that Dean wasn't gripping tightly, and he almost reached out to cup his cheek with it, but hesitated and pulled back his hand and placed it on Dean's shoulder instead.  
  
"My whole existence has been around you, for you. When I first got to you in the darkest pits of hell... As I gripped you tight and pulled you with me, it changed me. Already back then." He gripped at Dean's dirty old T-shirt. "So many tried to pull me away from you. I have been brainwashed, demoted, they erased you from my mind so many times. But I still found my way back to you. Or you found me, even as I did not deserve your help or your forgiveness."  
  
Castiel's hand had trailed to Dean's neck, up to his throat now. He stroked his thumb just once against the beat over his adam's apple.   
  
Dean wondered if Cas could feel how fast his heart was beating.  
  
"It has always been you, Dean. Never anyone else. I never meant for you to know, I have nothing to offer you. Everyone else," he said with another one of those bemused lopsided smiles. "They always knew. Sam too. I was happy you weren't as observant as your brother concerning this. I have always been content to just be in your company. I wouldn't ever ask anything from you other than your friendship."  
  
He stared straight into Dean's eyes now, and gave him the most brilliant smile, his blue eyes dancing. "And now you are asking me if I would accept to try... you? Is this correct?"  
  
Dean nodded dumbly, "Er," he had to clear his throat. "Yeah. That's it." His moved his hand now, too, up to settle at Castiel's cheek. The stubble felt rough against his hand and he likes it. He smiled at Castiel as he stroked down his cheek with two fingers.  
  
"If you'd have me," Dean smiled and leaned forward and down just a little. "Please."  
  
It was Cas who crossed the final barrier, pulling his hand behind Dean's neck and pulling him closer so their lips finally crushed together in a kiss.  
  
And it was even better than the memory of his dream.  
  
Castiel's body was firm and hard against his as they pressed closer and closer together, and Cas is more enthusiastic than Dean would have thought, opening his mouth to Dean's tongue, battling for control against each other. One of his arms were moving around Dean's neck and the other had just moved from his throat so his hand was cupping the side of Dean's face. Cas made a whimpering sound in the back of his throat, and damn it if it wasn't the most beautiful thing Dean had ever heard. He moaned back into Castiel's mouth and tried to prove just how much he wants this, wants Cas.  
  
Dean had wound his hands around Castiel's back, his hands slowly sneaking under the sweater he was wearing to knead at his lower back, stroke at his sides, touching skin and enjoying the feel of Castiel's body trembling against his own.  
  
After a few minutes they pulled apart, Dean with his eyes closed as he was catching his breath. Cas' hand was still at Dean's face, but stroking at his cheek. As Dean had gotten his breathing under control again, he opened his eyes to see Castiel gazing at him with that brilliant smile on his face. His own smile broke free, wild and uninhibited, as Castiel opened his mouth and said,  
  
"Hello, Dean."

 


End file.
